Why do fans get a top 25?

My brother posed a question yesterday and then graced us with his angelic words.  Ok he is a crazy man but we love him.  Well to answer his question i have taken an in depth fan poll and uncovered some interesting things about the "fan poll."  So here it is as well as the reasons they are where they are.

1.)  Texas Tech-  Tech is undefeated, that alone earns them a few first place votes from their over zealous fans.  But Lubbock is located in the sparsely populated west texas so how did they get all those votes.  I will tell you, it is because my good friend Kreig, an avid Tech supporter, is the anti-christ and used a jedi mind-trick to convince everyone in the nation to vote for Texas Tech, twice.

2.) Penn State-Penn State, like Tech is undefeated once again earning them some first place votes.  But Penn State has a huge problem.  See every fan of Big 10 schools wants to see Penn State get destroyed by a power house school from a stronger conference so they are trying to vote them into the national title game.

3.) USC-USC is only ranked so high because USC is in Hollywood and everyone in Hollywood believes in stupid fucking Fairy Tales.  FUCK USC!

4.) Florida-I think that florida deserves to be in the top ten.  So it is not a stretch that they might make the top 5 in a fan poll.  See Gainseville is a small town and the only thing to do there is to get on ESPN.com and vote for the Gators, and beat up other frat boys.

5.)  TCU-This is a good football team.  I can see why they could possibly ould be ranked so high.  Also Iowa State and Baylor fans are repeatedly voting for TCU in hopes that they will get spared the embarassment of staying in the Big 12.

6.) Boise State-Well they again are undefeated so at the risk of sounding monotonous its a good reason to vote them high.  But this high is kinda ridiculous.  After reading more into this I found this was actually an accident.  MAC voters were actually trying to vote for Ball State but where blinded by some hideous blue turf.

7.) Georgia-Georgia is a great team and they are making a n arguement toward the fact that they might be one of the best teams in the SEC.  They have a great offense despite their young offensive line.  Their defense is not losing games for them so they are good.  But their over-rankage comes from all the bored Gainesville gator fans voting Georgia high so that the Gators can get another quality win so maybe other SEC fans will forget that they lost to Ole Miss.

8.) Minnesota-This is just Big 10 fans  trying to strengthen their conference by delusions of Grandeur.  They aere a good team but the Big 10 makes them a highly doubtful top 10 pick. Maybe its not big 10 voters this time, I think it is because Minnesota is nicknamed the Gophers and Canadiens love that shit.  Damn those Canadiens they ruin everything sacred about football, this and the CFL are prime examples.

9.) Ball State-An undefeated team that is totally unproven.  I can understand why MAc fans are so excited about a team that seems legitimate.  But the truth this is teh result of every drunken frat boy in America voting for a team that uses the first five letters in the university name to spell BALLS.

10.) Utah- Well they beat a Big 10 school but i really believe that a step sideways not forward.  They have cool helmets thats a good reason to rate them this high.  I think it is kind of redundant to say but they are undefeated.  The real reason they are ranked this high because after the BYU debaucle the mormons in Utah needed something to latch onto, so they voted for the Utes.  Good decision.

11.) Tulsa-Tulsa is a giant fraud.  They are just like the old Texas Tech teams that could run up the score and maybe just maybe they could outscore you.  But all in all they are garbage and they haven't played anyone.  But like my brother said they do win and that is their job.  Plus they score alot more than any of the bucked tooth inbred morons in Oklahoma, so they get those votes! Its alot to say when you are the only undefeated team in Oklahoma.

12.) Alabama- Ok who are we kidding Alabama is a top 10 team no matter how you slice it.  They are undefeated in the SEC which is like being republican in Texas your going to get the vote.  So I know they deserve to be in the top 10 but every bitter Saban-hating Miami Dolphin fan is voting them 160th and since there are just as many computers in Miami as there are in the whole state of Alabama, there you go it lands them right in the middle.

13.) BYU-I am so bitter about this team that I wish they were ranked 58th.  They totally let me down.  And we all know that you should never let me down.  I think they should be in the bottom of the top 25 but since all the Mormons are voting for Utah they have their multiple wives voting for BYU in hopes that they might make it in the top 10.

14.) Maryland-This team is a debaucle.  As my brother so elegantly put it, and Im parapharasing here, their defense is trash some times.  They are definately not a top 25 team.  I will give John credit.  He worked around the clock to devise a plan to overtake a prison housing illegal immigrants.  He then convinced them that if they all voted Maryland Terrapins number one they would be freed and allowed to vote on immigration policies in the United states. So tehy voted for the Terps, veinte veces!

15.) Kansas-Kansas is a great team with a tough schedule.  In the Pac 10 0r the Big 10 this would be an undefeated or one loss team depending on the non-conference schedule.  With all that said top 15 is a stretch, like Mangino's waistband.  They only reason that they mad in on the fan poll is because fans thought they were being asked which college football team's coach could play santa the most convincingly.  Kansas you win!

16.) Oklahoma-This is actually a great team.  It is a travesty that they are not in the top 10 of evey poll including the fan poll.  They are one of the most talented and well-coached teams in the NCAA and have been for years.  They only dropped this low on the fan poll because Okies are morons and they have already jumped on the Tulsa bandwagon.

17.)  Texas-This is bitter-sweet because I hate Texas.  But they are without a doubt the unanimous number one in the nation.   They have beat all the top teams they have played and they are looking better each week.   I have found a reason that they are ranked so low however,  see Mack Brown and George W. Bush look and sound alike so I believe that Texas' low rank is directly propotional to Dubyas approval rating, ohh tough break.  

18.) Oklahoma State-Oh come on this team is easily a top 10 team.  They proved their worth against Texas and I dont see blaming this one on the Okies.  But I will, this team is definately the victim of Okie stupidity based on imbreeding and lower alcohol content beer. I know they will be fine though because Mike gundy is a man and he's forty, or is it 41?

19.) South Florida- See south florida is a program on the rise but a team that just cant seem to finish.  they are good but voters and fans seem to be rulctant to vote them very high because they know it will be another big let down. Sort of like the Rays who lost in the World Series last night.  St. Petersburg/Tampa bay one giant let down.

20.)  Missouri-The fans might have got this one right.  This is a good team with two losses to really good teams.  This team truly does deserve to be in the top 15 but since the yuppie northern fans dont really have any clue where missouri is and the rest of the midwest hates missouri because it is majority black, they drop to number 20.

21.)  Michigan State-I dont really think we need another Big 10 school in the top 25 do you?   This is a middle of the road team in a weak conference.  I think that the only reason they squeeked into the top 25 on the fan poll is because the rest of the fans of Michigan fans need a team from there state to make it to a bowl game.  

22.)  Florida state-Yet another average team in an average conference.  You idiot fans forgot Notre Dame in this whole sham of a top 25.  Football fans are stupid especially for this one.  Maybe just maybe Bobby Bowden got confused and thought that he was voting for president and ended up voting for FSU sixty times in the fan poll. Retire already Bobby.

23.)  LSU- LSU is a victim of the tough SEC.  But since tehy looked crappy in the two losses they drop or so it would seem.  But it is really because nobody in the back ass bayous of Louisiana has a computer.  I think you can look for LSU to move up when the mail in ballots come in next month, but by then they might have lost again by then. Damn coonass!

24.)  Oregon-I didnt even know that Oregon was still playing football.  They are so under publicized that I didnt even know they were doing that good.  So I really cant understand how they made it into the fan top 25 unless al the guy working at Nike voted for them up there in Oregon.  If that is the case what do those guys know about sports. Idiots!

25.) Ohio State-It is no secret why Ohio State is the last team on this fan top 25.  No one really wants to see them being smashed by a superior opponent in the BCS National Championship Game so teh fans are sparing the buckeyes the embarassment by trying to keep them as far away from the top spot as possibly.  Maybe the best decision made in this joke poll!

So now you all know the inter workings of the Fan Poll.  I hope it is as helpful as I thought it would be!